Lil Chromozome - Christmas Cum

{intro: lil chromozome}
Mr. smith: oh my fucking god! i cannot believe it's christmas yet again! you know what that means! more christmas songs! let's get straight to it johnny!
Johnny: alright mr. smith. but don't yell at me this time, ok? i understand the material this time
Mr. smith: oh i know. i'm gonna kiss you hard
Johnny: wait what?

{chorus: lil chromozome}
Jingle bells
My butthole smells
Might have an std (oh no)
My doctor said that i was dead
But i murdered third degree *moan*
Jingle bells
Turtle shells
Mr. smith is gay (really?)
I grabbed his throat
Then he screamed like a goat
Then i kicked him out my way (get the fuck outta here)

{verse 1: lil chromozome}
I just grabbed his butt
But he doesn't seem to care (i like it)
Blow up an orphanage
No more childcare (where'd it go?)
When i go to sleep
I wanna wake up to some snow
If it is not there tonight
Then i'm gonna fucking blow (oh!)

{chorus: lil chromozome}
Jingle bells
Batman smells
Robin has a vagina (why?)
I fucked his holes with danimals
Batman is crying in the corner
Jingle bells
What rhymes with bells
Sucking off the maid (excuse me?)
There's a woman with a fat cock and she's standing over me (no!)

{verse 2: lil chromozome}
My grandma gave me money
But she didn't give me presents (are you kidding me?)
I started to kill her
But she told me she didn't regret it (she dead)
I killed her with my eyes
I got that light skin stare on deck (i'm gorgeous)
I took that money that my grandma got me
And i just spent it all (my money)

{chorus: forgotthealamo}
Got my dick, stuck in a coke bottle
Now there’s paramedics at my door
But i’m too scared to let ‘em inside
Cuz they asked what’s wrong and i flat out lied
I called 911 and i said i was dying
And also my baby was crushed by the tv and it caught on fire
And my diabetic grandma’s in a coma and -
Oh god here comes the fire chief

{interlude: forgotthealamo}
Fire chief: motherfucker why are you always doing this on christmas? answer me!
Bottlefucker: okay listen dude i can explain - hold on - shut the fuck - shut - shut the fuck up

{verse 3: forgotthealamo}
So basically it’s christmas
I’m prancing through the halls
I step into some water
And then i slip and fall (yeah right)
And what’s that on the ground
But a bottle of coke upright (uh huh?)
I fall onto my back
And then my penis slips inside…

{interlude: forgotthealamo}
Fire chief: that’s the fucking thing, every time you do this, every time you do this, there’s a new level of bullshit to it!
Bottlefucker: hey!
Fire chief: no, no! if you fell onto your back it would have gone up your ass that’s not how it works! you are risking actual lives because you can’t keep your dick in your pants. you live by yourself! go to the hospital like a normal person what the fuck?!?!?!
Bottlefucker: i was nervous okay?! i was so nervous! i didn’t think you guys would pick me up if i - if i didn’t have a good reason!
And i really wanted to take the ambulance because i like the flashing lights…
Fire chief: and like, why a coke bottle of all things?
Bottlefucker: um… okay it was the polar bear, it was the polar bear (on the wrapper! what do you want from me?)

{outro: lil chromozome}
Mr. smith: holy fucking shit that was straight fire on the fucking track!
Johnny: wait, mr. smith
Mr. smith: it's not mr. smith. it's santa hoe
Johnny: alright, santa. shouldn't it be, "that was straight icy on the track", not fire?
Mr. smith/santa: why the fuck would it be that? did you hit your head or something?
Johnny: well like 30 minutes ago you hit me pretty hard on the head with your fat cock
Mr. smith/santa: ho ho ho ho! you're right. i'm gonna do it again!
Johnny: *painful groan*
Mr. smith/santa: ho. ho. ho!