Not koi - Polar bear

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I wish I was dead
I blew a kiss to the gun buried under my bed
This isn't normal says a stupid voice
From a dusty corner in my head
It comes in waves
It always feels the same
The thoughts they pour over me
I swear I'm going insane
I'm losing my confidence again
It's not fair to blame my friends
It's getting hard to try to pretend
That I haven't grown to hate who I am
It's getting hard to try to pretend
That I haven't grown to hate who I am

Release Date: May 01, 2024

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Not koi

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The meaning of the song

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"Not koi" by Polar Bear is a haunting and introspective song that delves into the dark and heavy emotions of self-hate and depression. The lyrics paint a vivid picture of someone struggling with their inner demons, contemplating their own mortality and feeling overwhelmed by negative thoughts. The raw and vulnerable vocals paired with the melancholic melody create a sense of desperation and hopelessness that is both poignant and relatable. This song captures the inner turmoil of someone grappling with their own self-worth and the constant battle to find acceptance and love for themselves.

Biography

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okay maybe i am koi(jesus) but whatever.

i only make music for myself and i want to keep it that way. music is not my passion, just a way to keep my mind off of evil.