Known Demise - Repercussion

What could i even say about
What good would it do to try
What do i say when i'm gone
What do i say when i walked away

What do

I
Say after the fall
When i turned my tail and
I ran back to safety
I knew i was the only one
The only one who could escape
But what was i meant to do
What was i meant to

I left
Not looking back until everyone else had found footing on their own
Now
Only years later i'm
Learning so much
Learning how dark things would
Get

I can't pretend
It wasn't best for me
To wash my hands for the time
But all the same
The guilt chokes all the life from me
Thoughts of what could be and
What would be avoided if i could
Just sit with myself
I
Struggle with the thought
(the) thought that the only way out was to just hit eject
I
Can't trust the outcome when i was the only
I was the only one

Why
Did it end up like this
I
Didn't want to go like this
I
Dont know what to do from here
I'll just keep moving and i'll just keep pace until
I
Can't

Everyone saying how they fucking get it
All while telling me how fast it changed
How can i trust that there is no resentment
How can i believe it's all
Water
Under the bridge now

When i
Learned how
Hard it
Was on you
I wished i would have stayed but
We all
Know that
Wouldn't
Fix anything
It still tears into me