DVRKS0UL - Attempts

I know I'm loved
But I'm numb of it
I'm about to relapse
I'm gonna submit
Submit to the pain
I'm sick of this shit
Grab the knife
Look at my wrist
Don’t wanna live
It hurts to exist
Pain and sorrow
In which life consists

Ima take my pain
From being emotional
Slit my wrist
I'll make it physical
No one cares
It's like I'm invisible
Slitting my wrist
I got bloody fists
I ask myself
Why do I exist

I did not die
The last 3 times
And the pain I feel
The blade’s deep inside
Struggled with the veins
I'm going insane
Everyone says
I’m the one to blame
My rooms a mess
Like the thoughts in my mind
Wish I could go back
Go back and rewind
But my happiness’
Has been compromised
By trying to look for
What I'll nevеr find
Pop another pill
Get back on the grind
Brеak out the cage
Which I am confined
Tired of being criticized
I cut again
Now I'm hospitalized

There used to be warmth
Within my heart
Now I’m lonely
It’s cold and dark
Fuck I always hate this part

You can see the pain
See it in my eyes
I feel Dead inside, deprived
But I'm still alive
I'm in the backseat
While the reaper drives
Write a letter
And tell ‘em why
These thoughts in my head
They’ve always multiplied
I just wanna break
But I can’t ever cry
Life’s to hard
Wanna commit suicide
Parents ask why
Future look-in bright
All I have to do is look into the light
But I can't find it so I stay quiet
Fall to my knees I can't fight it