Saturday Night Live - We Got Brought

{phil}
My friend is going out and i'm tagging along
She's gonna see some pals she hasn't seen in so long

{heather}
It's my boyfriend's friend's birthday and i was free
Will i know people there? he said:

{heather's boyfriend}
You'll know me

{megan}
My sister's meetings friends. she said

{megan's sister}
You'll love 'em, i think

{megan}
I said, "i don't love strangers, but i do like to drink."

{alexis}
Everybody, this is phil

{phil}
Hey, i'm friends with alexis

{megan's sister}
Guys, this is my sister

{megan}
I flew in from texas

{heather's boyfriend}
And i finally brought my girlfriend

{heather}
That's me, i'm heather
Where did you three meet?

{alexis, heather's boyfriend and megan's sister}
We grew up together!

{phil}
Aw, they leave us at the table and they go do a shot

{heather}
They ask if we'll save their seats

{megan}
We say, "sure, why not?"

{phil}
But now we're three strangers that our friends forgot

{megan}
Uh-oh

{heather}
Uh-oh

{phil}
Uh-oh

(hook)

{heather, phil, and megan}
We got brought

{phil}
And we don't know each other

{heather, phil, and megan}
We got brought

{phil}
So we all have to suffer

{heather, phil, and megan}
We're all plus-ones just nodding a lot
And we all wanna leave, but it's only 8 o'clock
We got brought

(verse 2)

{megan}
It's hell on earth, but we try to push through
I ask, "where y'all from?"

{heather}
And i ask, "what do you do?"

{phil}
And i couldn't think of a single other question
So i also asked, "where y'all from?"

{heather}
We already covered that

{phil}
Does anyone have another question?

{megan}
Okay, so what's y'all's trauma?
I make my escape and say i'm going to the bathroom
But this crazy bitch says

{heather}
Oh, i'll go with you

{megan}
No, you won't!

{phil}
Is she leaving? nice meeting you
Now we're waiting at the bar and no one's coming by
And if there's one second of silence then we'll both die
So i reach into the depths of what i know
And i say, "did you know there's only been 25 deaths at disneyland since 1955?"
And she says

{heather}
Only?

{phil}
I say, "never mind." i ask, "what neighborhood is your apartment in?"
She says

{heather}
Brooklyn

{phil}
And i say, "oh, whereabouts in brooklyn?"
And without skipping a beat she says

{heather}
Oh, the safe part

{phil}
Which was shocking, so i panicked, and all i could say was, "oh good, i love the safe part."

{heather}
Wait, no, i said the south part

{phil}
No!

(hook)

{heather, phil, and megan}
We got brought!

{megan}
Your mutuals are gone! your mutuals are missing!
You're wandering in a dance club while your friends are reminiscing

{phil}
Where are our friends? where have they gone?
Why would they bring us here and leave us so long?

{megan}
You're all out of topics and the conversation's lazy
So you just keep on saying, "that's crazy."

{heather}
That's crazy

{heather, phil, and megan}
Oh really? that's crazy
So crazy. that's crazy
No way, that's crazy
Wow! crazy!

{phil}
That's crazy

{heather}
So crazy

(outro)

{phil}
Well, it's nice to meet you. it's getting late

{heather}
It's 8:05

{phil}
I don't want to be here anymore!

{heather, phil, and megan}
We got brought!