Sack Lunch! - The Tragic Trial of Jolly Saint Nicholas and His Beloved Reindeer Friend

{Verse 1}
Dasher's in trouble
Dancer's all stressed
Donner's a goner
Vixen's distressed
Grandma's outside face-first in snow
Run over by a reindeer whose nose is aglow

{Chorus}
Rudolph's on trial for the murder of grandma
Christmas is delayed this year
The presents will arrive a couple months later
As I testify to death by deer

{Verse 2}
Jolly Saint Nick has lost his charm
The jury deliberates hard
The evidence is overwhelming
With grandma face-down in the yard
The elves in attendance couldn't go stand
To testify to the gifts from his (?...)
(?...) the great Mrs. Claus couldn't seem to convince this court of law

{Chorus x2}
Rudolph's on trial for the murder of grandma
Christmas is delayed this year
The presents will arrive a couple months later
As I testify to death by deer
Rudolph's on trial for the murder of grandma
Christmas is delayed this year
The presents will arrive a couple months later
As I testify to death by deer

{Bridge}
Christmas is done
The gang's behind bars
The case was quite the slam dunk
Santa and Rudolph
Went down for life
As they found Claus was flying 'round drunk

{Chorus x2}
Rudolph's on trial for the murder of grandma
Christmas is cancelled this year
The presents won't arrive even a couple months later
'Cause I testified to death by deer

Rudolph's on trial for the murder of grandma
Christmas is cancelled this year
The presents won't arrive even a couple months later
'Cause testified to death by deer