The Lonely Island - Why Not Me?

{HOST 1, spoken}
Congratulations to all of the 90th Academy Award Nominees

{HOST 2, spoken}
I love these movies
But they never seem to choose the blockbusters, do they?

{HOST 1, spoken}
They sure don't
I guess they'll just have to settle for all that money, huh?

{THOR}
Why not me?
Do I not deserve a nomination?
The reviews were raves to be sure
"Fun for the whole family
Look no farther than Thor"

{WONDER WOMAN}
Why not me?
I left my family to fight for what's right
Saved the world from the devil below
But I'm sure it was hard for
Sir Daniel Day-Lewis to learn how to sew

{THOR & WONDER WOMAN}
Why not me?

{THOR}
I battled Cate Blanchett

{THOR & WONDER WOMAN}
Why not me?

{WONDER WOMAN}
I hid a sword in my dress

{THOR & WONDER WOMAN}
We both faced death it's true
But at least Lady Bird got into NYU...

{PENNYWISE}
Why not me?
In All The Money in the World
They kidnapped one kid
And they got a nomination
I killed hundreds
I guess that's what you get
When you're not
"Classically handsome"
Oscars so white
But I guess not for me
I need to raise my quote
So I can finally fix my teeth
Horror movies always get the shaft

{TIFFANY HADDISH, spoken}
Hey... let me do one!

(sung)
I peed while hanging from a zip-line
Meryl Streep has never done that

{THE 4 CHRISES}
We'd like to petition for
A new category:
"Best Chris"
Or you could just write "Chris"
On an Oscar
And we can share it
Trade off on weekends

{EVANS}
Roll call!

{HEMSWORTH}
Hemsworth!

{PRATT}
Pratt!

{EVANS}
Evans!

{PINE}
Pine!

{CHRIS ROCK}
Rock!

(sung)
What? It's us! The Chrises!

{THE 5 CHRISES}
Go Chris!

{MICHAEL FASSBENDER}
And why not The Snowman?
It was a box office smash

(spoken)
What's that? It wasn't?

(sung)
Well Oscars doesn't care
Since it was critically acclaimed

(spoken)
7% positive? Are you serious?

(sung)
Well I thought it was a neat idea

{AQUAMAN}
In The Shape of Water
I heard that a lady boned a fish man
But if you're gonna bone a fish man
Why not bone a fish like this man?

{DOMINIC TORETTO}
And what even is art?
How do you define its importance?
If popcorn movies are bad
How come popcorn's so delicious?
And when I blow up 6 cars
How is that worse than Schindler's List is?

{ALL}
Why not me?

{THOR & WONDER WOMAN}
We saved the world

{ALL}
Why not me?

{DOMINIC TORETTO}
I am Toretto

{ALL}
Why not me?

{AQUAMAN}
I heard a lady boned a fish man

{ALL}
Why not me?

{MICHAEL FASSBENDER}
The Snowman was underrated!

{ALL}
Why not me?

{THE 5 CHRISES}
We'd like to petition for
A new category:
"Best Chris"

{PENNYWISE}
I have terrible teeth

{ALL}
Why not me?

{THOR}
I got a cool new haircut

{ALL}
Why not me?

{BABY GROOT}
I am Groot

{ALL}
Why not us?